On January 3rd I started chemo with a lot of misgivings and fear because of past experiences both as a
nurse and through observation with close friends. Being diagnosed with terminal liver cancer is
definitely something I never expected, and the emotional roller coaster I have experienced over the last
several months has been life changing! The 23rd Psalm has been very precious to me as I have learned
that “He leadeth me” truly means I have to step back and let God lead, not an easy thing for someone
with my personality! We serve such an awesome God and I have been so comforted by the promise in
Psalms 103:14 “For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.”
Back in November, shortly after I was diagnosed, I had a liver biopsy that left me so weak I could not get out of bed without assistance. Several weeks ago after a visit to the Sarah Cannon Research Center in Nashville Tennessee, I was told I would need another liver biopsy in order to be enrolled in a clinical trial. Since my diagnosis, after spending two weeks at Eden Valley in Colorado and then coming home and continuing the holistic lifestyle changes--way too much carrot juice, fever baths, cancer killing infrared treatments, and most importantly totally committing my life to God and His leading--I have regained strength and the courage to fight this enemy that has invaded my body. However, the thoughts of having another liver biopsy filled me with terror; I have prayed and trusted, but my humanness had created this fear in the pit of my stomach that just would not go away. Besides this, I have had to deal with the reality that with a terminal illness, life will never be the same again in many ways. I have had to accept the fact that living on disability is completely different than being able to work hard and deal with my previous financial commitments. Recently I found a promise in Psalms that has answered the longings of my heart, “I will not be afraid of evil tidings; my heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. My heart is established; I will not be afraid! Psalms 112:7, 8
The whole Bible is full of precious promises for times when the future seems daunting with impossible situations that make us, as humans, feel as if we are drowning! Life is so fragile and in the blink of an eye everything can change. I personally feel that God is our only stability, the Rock that we can cling too, the anchor that we can trust, and as I have traveled this road of cancer, He has given me “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding.” Philippians 4:7
Last Monday night I had a wonderful visit with my neighbors of 25 years, Ben and Sally Clark.We walked down memory lane, laughed, sang gospel music, and prayed together. The visit eased my worries and I felt God’s peace wash over me, which filled my heart to overflowing. Tuesday, January 29th, Terri, my wonderful sister-in-law who has accompanied me to every doctor visit and chemo appointment, took me to Nashville, and my liver biopsy was completed without even the slightest complication. Tomorrow I start back on chemo, but I know that God is holding me in the palm of His hand, so I have nothing to fear. I have been surrounded by so much love that my heart is truly humbled and words cannot even begin to express my gratitude to everyone for their love, prayers and support.
I have lived on Lookout Mountain for 27 years but God has gently led me to the realization that it is time to let go and move on. Given my illness and my mother’s age, we have decided that we need to be closer to family and support. The fact that I am filled with peace about this move has been such a
Back in November, shortly after I was diagnosed, I had a liver biopsy that left me so weak I could not get out of bed without assistance. Several weeks ago after a visit to the Sarah Cannon Research Center in Nashville Tennessee, I was told I would need another liver biopsy in order to be enrolled in a clinical trial. Since my diagnosis, after spending two weeks at Eden Valley in Colorado and then coming home and continuing the holistic lifestyle changes--way too much carrot juice, fever baths, cancer killing infrared treatments, and most importantly totally committing my life to God and His leading--I have regained strength and the courage to fight this enemy that has invaded my body. However, the thoughts of having another liver biopsy filled me with terror; I have prayed and trusted, but my humanness had created this fear in the pit of my stomach that just would not go away. Besides this, I have had to deal with the reality that with a terminal illness, life will never be the same again in many ways. I have had to accept the fact that living on disability is completely different than being able to work hard and deal with my previous financial commitments. Recently I found a promise in Psalms that has answered the longings of my heart, “I will not be afraid of evil tidings; my heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. My heart is established; I will not be afraid! Psalms 112:7, 8
The whole Bible is full of precious promises for times when the future seems daunting with impossible situations that make us, as humans, feel as if we are drowning! Life is so fragile and in the blink of an eye everything can change. I personally feel that God is our only stability, the Rock that we can cling too, the anchor that we can trust, and as I have traveled this road of cancer, He has given me “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding.” Philippians 4:7
Last Monday night I had a wonderful visit with my neighbors of 25 years, Ben and Sally Clark.We walked down memory lane, laughed, sang gospel music, and prayed together. The visit eased my worries and I felt God’s peace wash over me, which filled my heart to overflowing. Tuesday, January 29th, Terri, my wonderful sister-in-law who has accompanied me to every doctor visit and chemo appointment, took me to Nashville, and my liver biopsy was completed without even the slightest complication. Tomorrow I start back on chemo, but I know that God is holding me in the palm of His hand, so I have nothing to fear. I have been surrounded by so much love that my heart is truly humbled and words cannot even begin to express my gratitude to everyone for their love, prayers and support.
I have lived on Lookout Mountain for 27 years but God has gently led me to the realization that it is time to let go and move on. Given my illness and my mother’s age, we have decided that we need to be closer to family and support. The fact that I am filled with peace about this move has been such a
God thing. I am so blessed because my wonderful brother Lewis and his wife Terri are willing to give
of their financial means so that Mom and I can not only have a place to live but be blessed with the
country like feel that means so much to my heart. I am putting my house on the market next week and
would deeply appreciate everyones prayers that God will work a miracle so that it will sell before it
goes into forclosure.
The support of family, my wonderful children and friends is such a gift and I am so thankful! I have to end with a quote on the tee shirt my sweet Jessica just sent me in the mail:
Advice from a waterfall
Go with the flow
Roar with excitement
Let your cares fall away
Create your own music
Immerse yourself in nature
Stay active
Make a splash
The support of family, my wonderful children and friends is such a gift and I am so thankful! I have to end with a quote on the tee shirt my sweet Jessica just sent me in the mail:
Advice from a waterfall
Go with the flow
Roar with excitement
Let your cares fall away
Create your own music
Immerse yourself in nature
Stay active
Make a splash
Life is filled with roads we'd rather not take. But we are on them so we ask for guidance and faith to carry on. I am a better person for having you in my life and know my daughter-in-law has a wonderful and beautiful role model..you, her mom. Looking forward to spending time together. Hugs....
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your kind words!!! You have been such an inspiration to me!!!! It will be wonderful to catch up--so looking forward to your visit! I can definitely return the compliment because you raised an awesome son :) Yes, there are tough roads to travel but I have learned that behind every cloud is a silver lining and as long as one searches for that glimmer it makes one stronger and the path a little easier to travel!!! Hugs. . .
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